Blazing for Her Page 5
“I've seen worse, and so have you brother, you're not getting old on me, are you?" I love poking fun with McBride, sometimes his face gets all red, and that's when I know that I've really touched a nerve.
"Very funny old-timer, you what ten years older than me, are you sure you can still keep up with me is the real question," he joked, throwing his sweat-drenched tee shirt at me.
What would I do without my brothers? We've been through so much together, and I've known the majority of them for over a decade. I've seen the pits of hell with them, and I've saved and been more than most men ever live to tell about. If I had to choose between staying a Captain and being with Elena, I can't say with confidence I would choose the job. I've been with the job for my entire adult life, fire has been a constant catalyst in my life. It's brought me pain, fear, passion, and now dare I say the possibility of love and not just any kind of love. A love that I feel could last the remainder of my life, but only if I give it time to grow. I can't help but feel that Elena is going to have to make a tough decision soon, and I don't want to lose her before we've even really gotten started.
Maybe I should back off a bit and give her some room to breathe, I'm sure me being around her all the time is clouding her good judgment. This thing between us is new and so fresh that I think we're both lost in our rising feelings for each other. I think maybe it's time to take a step back so that she can figure things out.
"How's it going with Elena?" Shit, I was thinking so hard about Elena that I forgot McBride was still in the room. "Man, you're one lucky bastard, she's not an easy one to find or to hold onto for that matter."
“I'm not sure, to be honest, I think I'm falling in love with her too fast man. I need to take a step back and think."
"Think about what, haven't you been thinking for the past ten years?" He smirked, looking like he was joking, but I know he was being real with me. "Look, Washington, I've known you for years, and I've watched women come and go in your life, but I’ve never seen a woman look at you the way she does. I’ve never seen a woman come into our house just to spend time with someone before, that’s very rare.”
"I know, but I feel like I'm keeping her from what she's meant to do. She wasn't supposed to be here in our town for this long. She has a life and a career to consider, and I don't want her to regret being here hanging out with me."
“I get it, but believe me, if a woman like that wanted to be with me, I would be all over her," he chuckled while he changed shirts. "Let her make up her own mind. Don't try to make it up for her. Just be there when she does and accept her decision. Don't punk out on her just yet, my friend."
“Thanks, McBride," I say, slapping him on the back.
“Alright, don’t be getting all mushy on me, she really has done a number on you." He laughed again, shaking his head, leaving the locker room completely silent with me standing alone in it.
Whoever said being alone with your thoughts was a good thing must not have been an aging fireman on the verge of rejection.
~~~
Elena
I hate conference calls about business. After firing Daniel, I immediately went on the search for someone new to represent me in case everything here that I thought was going to be so wonderful, went south. I had to go back on tour. No matter how much I hated the idea, it was my reality and something I can't put off for much longer. Thank the Lord for Kelly. She's been sort of acting as my honorary agent since Daniel's dismissal. I must say she's been ten times the better advocate for my wellbeing than he ever was, the jerk. He even tried to blackball me and sully my good name with other agents, but he didn't account for agents overseas, and that was his mistake.
"Good afternoon, Kelly," I smiled, connecting our Skype call. God, I hate technology sometimes. “How are things going, did you speak to the connection you sent me earlier this week?”
"Hey, Elena, I did, and they're eager to speak with you. How are things there with Captain hottie?" she smiled while adjusting her computer screen.
"They're going quite well actually, but as you know, I'm going to have to make a decision soon on whether I want to tour again or settle down. Even if he wasn't in the picture, I was going to have to make that choice for myself sooner rather than later.”
"I don't know much, Elena, but what I do know is that I've never seen you this happy before. No matter what decision you make moving forward, please keep that in mind, and that's my rational answer."
"If I asked you to give me your irrational answer, what would it be?" I wondered, pulling my laptop closer to me so that I could see her reaction clearly.
“You really want to know?” she asked with a tiny hint of trepidation.
"Yes, Kelly, I really want to know."
"Girl, you better not let that man go, he's hot as hell, a mature man who probably knows how to please if you know what I mean, and he's obviously head over freakin heels about you. There I said it, happy now?"
I couldn't help but let out a room-shaking laugh at how blunt Kelly was. She's always so composed. It’s wonderful to see that she’s a person that says what’s on her mind when asked, just like me.
"Kelly, you're too much. If I decide that traveling and touring is still for me after all this, would you please be my manager?"
“Of course, darling, I would have it no other way.”
With my conference calls all done for the day, I had time to sit and think for a moment about what should be done, now that I think about it. I haven't heard from Washington since yesterday afternoon, and it's almost nighttime now. He hasn’t been silent since we started going out. I think this is the longest we haven’t spoken since the day we officially met. He's probably just busy. After all, he is a fireman first and foremost. I hope that he's okay. I can't explain it, but just as I started to think about him and realize that he's been missing from my life for more than twenty-four hours, I got a sour feeling in my stomach. Something's wrong, I know it, I can feel it.
I decide to drop what I was getting ready to do and call the station because he never picks up his cell.
I get him on the phone, but everything feels all wrong, he's very short and standoffish with me, nothing like what he's been these past weeks that we've been together. He's cold, and I can hear the fear in his voice. I knew right then what was happening. He's running.
~~~
Washington
"If Elena calls back guys, tell her I'm busy, and I'll call her back," I tell everyone, hoping that no one will come knocking on my door asking questions for once. I don't think my heart can take it. I have to give this some space if it's going to work between us.
She needs time to get her life in order whether she knows it or not, and I'm going to help her do it. The more time she spends with me, the more she's going to forget. She's said it to me several times herself that she forgets when she's with me. I think that's maybe why she likes me so much. I'm the man who saved her life, this savior, this man who shared one of the worst days of her life with her. She's attached to me, but is it for the right reasons, or am I just some fantasy for her?
Does what's going on between us even make sense? We're from two different worlds, two different age ranges. She has a talent that I've never seen before. How can I compete with Milan, Paris, and Japan? I'm just your neighborhood fireman?
I think it's only right to let her go, and if we're meant to be, she will come back to me, and I'll be here waiting, ready to take whatever she wants to give me.
I'm a strong man, a fighter, I'm stubborn as hell, and I've never been this insecure and broken down emotionally in my life. I couldn’t be any happier than I am when I’m with Elena, but I want to make sure that she, without a shadow of a doubt, feels the same for me. I don't want to be another woman's fantasy. I’ve been there and done that with women looking to fuck a fireman and wanting nothing more than to climb my pole.
It's fun while it lasts; don't get me wrong, but once it's over, you're the one left alone to live another day without knowing what true
love is. Something I never thought I would have. As cliché' as it sounds, my parents have set high standards for me to live up to, and they are my models for everlasting love.
Someone's knocking on my door already. It's probably McBride or Landon wondering what's going on with Elena and me. I swear if I didn't know any better, I would think that those two were ready to plan our wedding soon.
“Come in," I yell at the door, ready to get hit with twenty questions. "Listen you guys, I don't want to talk about—Elena, what are you doing here?"
“I came to see you; we need to talk.”
"What's so important that you couldn't have discussed with me over the phone, Elena?" I stand firm, bracing myself for the inevitable.
"Why are you avoiding me, and why are you so cold to me?" she asked, moving closer to stand right in front of me. "Is there something I should know? Are you tired of me now?"
"Of course, not Elena. I just felt that we needed some time apart so that we both can figure things out." Oh Lord, it's about to hit the fan now. I can tell that she came in with her guns blazing, ready to shoot me down as soon as I say anything that she doesn't agree with. "I felt like us seeing each other so much was getting in the way of you exploring your full potential."
She's going to kill me. I can feel it.
"Let me worry about my potential Washington, I have a papa, and his residence is in Texas."
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that, Elena. Believe me, I have your best interest at heart. I really care for you, but where did you think this was really going to go? I mean, think about it. I'm a fireman that lives in a small town who's never been anywhere out of the United States."
"So, what is that supposed to mean. Is that supposed to stop me from loving you and from wanting to be with you? Are you saying that I'm that shallow that I wouldn't enjoy the company of a regular, average, hardworking man? Is that it?"
"I can't compete, Elena. I can't hold you here and watch your talent slip by because you may fall in love with me. I just don't want you to regret this while you're still young enough to change your mind."
"You know what Washington, if you can't see or feel how perfect we are together, how connected we've become in such a short amount of time, then that's your problem, not mine." Elena looked at me one last time before she stormed out, slamming the door as hard as she could behind her. I knew that I loved her right then if I didn't already know it before. Even the way she slammed the door was beautiful.
I had to go after her and explain so that she could really understand how I was feeling.
Moving fast out of my office, I ran after her hoping to catch her before she pulled off in her rental.
“Elena!" I yelled, catching the attention of my brothers and everyone driving by including her.
She hadn't had the chance to pull off yet, so I asked her to roll down her window and talk to me. She did so, and I asked her if she would go somewhere with me.
I need to show her that it’s not what she thinks.
~~~
Elena
I have no idea where he's taking me. I decided it was better for him to drive since he knew all the roads and didn't need to use the navigation system. This town really isn't big enough to use navigation, but it came with the rental, and I don't usually know where I'm going when I'm driving around here.
"Where are you taking me, Washington?" I asked, still very annoyed by his earlier behavior towards me. "If you're taking me somewhere quiet to break up with me so that everyone at the fire station won't know, then you're wasting your time and my gas."
"I wouldn't do that Elena, I just wanted to share something with you, something I don't share with many people, and then after I'm done, if you still want to go, I'll let you go. I can call one of the guys to come and pick me up."
He seemed sincere and oddly very nervous but not like that I have to tell you something and you’re going to get mad nervous, it was more like he was nervous because whatever he was sharing with me might change our relationship forever.
I watched as we pulled up to an abandoned burnt down shell of a house. It was obvious it had been in a fire, and it had been neglected for years.
“What is this place?” I ask him, trying to gauge the look of indifference on his face.
“It’s my childhood home,” he answered, parking into the driveway and climbing out.
He came across the passenger side, opened the door for me extending his hand to me, helping me out. That's not the actions of a man ready to break someone's heart, so I relaxed a bit and followed him to the front door and into the burnt-up space. This must have happened many years ago, but I swear I can still smell the walls burning around me. This brought back memories of the fire, and I started to shake.
“I'm sorry, are you cold?" he asked, wrapping his arms around me and holding me close.
His body felt warm and safe. He's very tall and muscular, so the two of us standing together must look odd to others, but to me, we fit just right. I love that he's a man's man, but he knows how to be sweet and respectful. He hasn't even tried anything sexually with me yet.
"No, I just remembered something about the day of the fire, and it gave me chills."
“I've got you, Elena. I won't let anything happen to you, not on my watch," he breathed into my hair. I like him this way, confident, cool, and eager to take care of me. "What happened here, I hope all of this happened after you moved away?"
“No, this happened when I was fifteen. I almost lost my youngest brother Franky in this fire.”
I felt the breath slowly leave my body, and all I could do was hold on to his strong arms that were still wrapped around me.
“My God, Washington, is he okay, was he burned or injured?” I turned around now so that I could search his eyes for emotion, and they had none. They were cold and impartial.
"He didn't get hurt other than smoke inhalation and a short hospital stay. My father went in to rescue him."
“Is that why you wanted to become a fireman, because of your brother?”
"Yes, and that's also why I've never let anyone in. Seeing my brother almost lose his life in that fire closed my heart off somehow, and I've never opened it back up until I met you." He dropped his gaze so that he could look into my eyes. I could see his fear of loving me. I could see his passion and desire for me. I could see all the many layers of Washington Drake coming to the surface, and it was breathtaking.
“I've got you, Washington. I won't let anything happen to you, not on my watch." And with that, we began to kiss each other in the dark in front of his past as we moved together into the future.
We kiss deep. Deeper than it's ever been before. I could feel it rush through me like a tidal wave strong and fast catching me completely off guard.
"I don't want to lose you, Elena, but I don't know if it's right to want you to stay here with me," he says, pulling away from my lips, leaving me breathless. "Your life would be waste here with me in this small little town. You’re so much bigger than this,” he motioned towards the area surrounding us.
“Washington, let me be the judge of that, let me decide what’s too small or too big for me.”
With all the love for him that I had inside of me, I pulled him close, kissing his temple. "I will make sure no matter what I choose in my life from now on, it will always involve you. Don’t be afraid of me, Washington. You saved me now let me save you.”
Once again, we begin to kiss deeply and passionately inside the place that began and ended.
"I want you, Elena, right here right now, but I know a dirty abandoned house isn't ideal for our first time."
"I have a blanket in the trunk," I say, panting with anticipation.
"Stay here." I watch as he leaves out of the remaining door and opens the trunk of my rental, retrieving the blanket.
Thank goodness I come prepared.
Chapter 7
Elena
Putting the blanket down in the middle of what used to be probably one of the bed
rooms, he did his best to make it as comfortable as possible for us.
Reaching his hand out beckoning me, he puts his hand in mine, then leads me to the flat palette in the middle of the room and lays me down in the center. I reach up to touch him, and he leans into my touch, surrendering to me, giving me his heart.
Leaning down to me, he kisses me with pure passion pulling me to him, caressing my back and sliding his hands down to the top of my ass. He takes my lips into his mouth, teasing me with a gentle bite before letting go.
"You taste so good," he says, leaning into our kiss once again. Cupping me, he lifts me on top of him to straddle him, squeezing and running his hands up and down my back then into my hair, pulling my curly raven tendrils.
I'm paralyzed. There are so many sensations happening all at once that I don't know what to focus on. His touch is intoxicating, so much so that I become overwhelmed with emotion that starts to tear up.